The upside of labels.

Labeling is one of the first things we do as babies. Our brain learns to associate certain objects with words. We label the iconic red-round-sweet fruit as an apple. And after that it’ll be hard to think of it as anything other than an apple. Once we have enough associations stored in our memory, we begin to develop language. We start with one word. Then we move to a two-word sentence and so on. At some point in our lives, we begin to develop our sense of self. 

As young adults we seek to develop our identity by labeling what we like and dislike, like if we’re a morning person or a night owl. This becomes more complex in our teenage years when we seek to both fit in and explore. As we grow up we try to understand ourselves better, seek outside approval and constantly label ourselves to construct our personalities. Much of this happens by reacting to different situations. As we’ll see, learning how to use labels to empower yourself is not only important, but necessary.

Perception

Let’s start with perception. If you throw some labels, interactions, and reflections into the personality soup, what you end up with is your perceived experience. After some schooling—we become young adults with our pool of labels and their attached emotions: ready to do more of what we think works well and what doesn’t.

The distinction is that a lot of what happened growing up was reactive rather than proactive. Instead of dreading the labels that do not resonate with yourself, you can now choose the labels that you want. Can you think of one of your self-made labels? Are you a summer person or a winter person? Do you like numbers? Are you artsy? Do you get easily irritated? Are you a fun person? Do you like pickles?

Identity

Labels make up your identity. The funny thing is that I am (and I can be) whatever I decide to be. When going out to dinner with friends, sometimes they kindly ask me if I am a vegetarian, or if I have any dietary restrictions. The answer, or should I say, my label is always: I like everything. And I do. Think about this for a moment: every powerful label you have ever decided to attach to yourself is self-fulfilling.

For instance, somehow in fourth grade I decided that I was going to like math. This label transformed my life: I practiced it, I enjoyed it, I got good at it and eventually became an engineer. It just so happens that all I have labeled myself to be good at has led to engagement and development. And the opposite is also true. If you have debilitating or limiting labels it’ll also work against you. Let’s call this more elaborate labels beliefs.

In Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life, Nir Eyal says: “…What we say to ourselves is vitally important. Labeling yourself as having poor self-control actually leads to less self-control. Rather than telling ourselves we failed because we’re somehow deficient, we should offer self-compassion by speaking to ourselves with kindness when we experience setbacks.”

He continues: “We can cope with uncomfortable internal triggers by reflecting on, rather than reacting to, our discomfort. We can reimagine the task we’re trying to accomplish by looking for the fun in it and focusing on it more intensely. Finally, and most important, we can change the way we see ourselves to get rid of self-limiting beliefs. If we believe we’re short on willpower and self-control, then we will be. If we decide we’re powerless to resist temptation, it becomes true. If we tell ourselves we’re deficient by nature, we’ll believe every word.”

Is it really that easy? To just believe I can be courageous or self-compassionate? All the studies seem to agree. You can just look at your life and find out for yourself. Be the person that believes in yourself. Act on those positive beliefs to keep growing as a person.

Growth

So what can you do with your labels? You have the power to label yourself to like things that you think you don’t like and to see yourself as a person that can learn and triumph over matters you might have not yet considered. There is an abundance to be discovered! Did you know that in Mexico there is a beverage made from fermented corn called Tejuino? Tejuino is one of those beverages that I have found people to either love or hate—apparently no in-betweens. It’s really not that visually appealing and the beverage has a texture to it.

And yet, it is an ancient beverage that dates back to the Aztecs! It comes from the Nahuatl word Teocinte which according to the Real Academia Española comes from the Aztec words for God and dried corn. This is not just any beverage. This is a living legacy of what ancient Aztecs thought of as divine food. Tejuino is served cold with a lot of fresh lime juice, sea salt, and topped with artisan lime ice cream. When you use labels correctly, you feel empowered to try new things, not just banal things such as a drink, but really anything that you’d like to do. You believe yourself capable and much more. Your perception of what you can and cannot do (and how successful you’ll be) will change as a result.

Much of the world is yet to be discovered if you choose to label yourself differently. If you decide to like something, you will most likely expose yourself to it, practice it, enjoy it, get better at it, and open an abundance of possibilities. Change your labels so that they enable you to perceive situations more clearly and feel empowered about them: going outside your comfort zone is usually a matter of labeling it positively. How to use labels to empower yourself is about choosing the labels that bring the best in you. Empowering labels invite you to learn, to change, and to grow positively. Ditch the limiting labels, and embrace the empowering ones! Take flight!